If there is anyone who drives a Caprice, or any car with a V8 Small Block or V8, then this may save you hundreds of dollars and make your car's performance tripple. I never really noticed the lapse in performance of my car -- I just assumed it was normal for the power to decrease as it got older. Then, Pete made a suggestion: get a tune up - change your air filter, oil, etc. So later that week I bought an air filter, oil filter, and oil. Obviously I couldn't change my oil that night but I did manage to put the new air filter in. Low and behold, my engine was roaring-loud. I thought something was wrong... not until I floored it did I realize that life had been restored to my engine. I went from like 20 to 50 in 3 seconds! As simple as changing your air filter! Power doubled, gas mileage and fuel economy doubled. Never thought something so inexpensive and simple could make such a difference, but it does! So, if you notice when you floor it that your car goes "God dammit, don't do that! Please stop!" then try changing your air filter before you bring it to the shop. I did, and now my V8 is getting all the hot air it could ever need (that was funny I think)!

Hey,, 
 
i read your page and i am not here to argue with you.. but simply to 
tell you that you have some wrong stats about the Probe GT..
 
Did you know that an 89-92 stock probe GT's horsepower is 
underrated,, and that the actual horsepower at the crank is 185,.. 
What does this mean??
 
Well.. as an owner of a ford probe,, which is completely stock,, i 
can tell you that It can do 0-60 in 6.7 seconds... and quarter mile 
in 15.2 seconds...
 
I don't think your car can do this,, but if i am wrong.. let me know,
 
Also.. the probe has an automatic suspension Control which 
automatically adjusts the stiffness to the way you are driving...
 
And just to let you know,, the probe GT turbo is very good on gas,, 
as long as you don't floor it the whole time....
 
And lets face it,, which car looks better>>>???
 
Exactly
 
 
Thanks for listenin
 
Paul



hey whats up
    i got an 84 caprice classic w/ a 305 and it hauls asssss!!!!!  Im known 
around town for leaving posi strips at stop signs and red lights all over.  
the gas pedal in "the Titanic" is touchy, but thats to my advantage.  and i 
totally agree that probes suck!!  a kid in my auto class had one and he said 
my car wouldn't do 0-60 in a weekend.
Man did he look like a retard when i passed him doing over 100 in a 40 zone, 
he probably shit his pants.  what else can i say other than old chevys never 
die!!!



I would just like to add to your very funny letters on your webpage.  Never 
have I been more amused to see some people think theyre probes are fast.  I 
have a friend with a probe GT turbo with a 5 speed. While they are pretty 
quick...my 94 lumina 4-door 3.4 has had no problem leaving it in the dust 
many times.  and my lumina runs 15.5 in the quarter..consistantly.  I love 
caprices and i own one myself.  Its a 94' 9C1 and i suggest you pick one up 
if you have the chance. I paid 2200 bucks for it through police auction.  I 
can gurantee itll smoke any probe and any stock shit-stang.  Ive done it many 
times. With a very dirty air filter...it ran low 14's at the track, and is 
capable of much much more.   Theyve got posi and the whole bit, ive left dual 
black strips on many roads.  Do about 25-30 mph and step on it...itll slam 
you back into your seat as the tires sqeal as it grabs first gear.  No probe 
stands a chance.  CHEVY POWER! 



From: BRIAN
Ford Probes resemble logs in a toilet!  
Much like all that small foreign junk with wimpy engines.




hi. the name is steve. i'm from canada and your caprice is lookin'
good. i own a 85 classic as well. as we speak, i am putting a
427 big block that's pushing about 470hp.3.73 gears.dual flowmasters.
just with the stock 305 and changing my tranny from a 700r4 to a
350 turbo made it fly. i have beaten 5.0 mustangs and camaros and
even those japoon cars, hell a cavalier can beat the japoons anyday.
get more horsepower by just getting a napa brand carb kit and slap
some sae 50 weight oil ( compression in a bottle )in the crank.
also, flip the breather upside down to hear the quadrajet moan
like a son of a whore!
ford suck big donkey dick, and i don't know why they would even think
that there fast cars, i can run faster than those pieces of shit.
if your in n.b. ,  look for snot green caprice that has crossflags
bearing the 427 emblem.  thanks

steve doussaud
grand bay,new brunswick, canada
[email protected]



Brian,

I saw a reference to your Caprice vs Probe web page on a mail list that
I subscribe to.  I thought your page was very funny and I understand
your feelings on the subject quite well. 

<snip>

I've been unfortunate enough to see the amount of damage a caprice can
sustain and still be drivable.  My dad was T-boned by a pickup in his
old '84 Impala (we bought 2 '84's at the same auction) and recently I
T-boned a Dodge Neon that blew threw a stop sign with my '88 Caprice
(neither accident was our fault).  All I'll say is that they are VERY
tough cars.

I commend you on not resorting to violence to settle your beef with that
car assaulting jerk.  Although the old saying 'violence is the last
resort of the incompetent' always rings through my head, I don't know if
I would have been able to keep my cool if I saw someone kicking my car
out of malice.

Salvatore



     I'm surprised the fool who kicked your door isn't dead yet! I treat my
Caprice Classic 1981 with tender loving care. These cars are without flaw!
(well, maybe the paint could have been better)

     For a year I was forced to drive a 1991 Ford Tempo. It also had a 2.2
litre 4 cylinder engine similar to the model of the probe. That engine
sucked ass beyond human imagination. When I had to get on the onramp of the
highway, I pressed the accelerator to the floor and the car barely moved.
Now, when I tap my accelerator on my Caprice, the car blazes forward. the
305 with the 4 bbl carb hauls serious ass.

     Oh, and even, by some weird fluke of life, the probe won, who cares?
The Caprice is luxurious like  a Cadillac, big like a boat, powerful enough
to tow trailers and you see ten times more Caprices on the road then Ford
Probes and Tempo's combined.

     Your friend is delusional. My Caprice may be close to 2.5 tons, but it
will still go fast, ride smooth, and kill yo mama.

thanks...

Ed



Howdy doo!!!!   My name is Luigi and I am the VERY PROUD owner of a 
beautiful 1980 chevy caprice classic.  It also has a 305 v8, and I love 
it!!!  I'm 17 years old (18 in one month exactly) and i would love to 
maybe get in touch with other proud owners and see what they think.  I 
found the "build sheet" (the piece of paper that went with the car as it 
headed down the assembly line) and it showed the car to be finished 5 
days after i was born!!!!  April 15, 1980!!!  therefore, I am very close 
to it...I baby it and feed it premium and so forth, i love it and I have 
driven my friends ford probe and it SUCKS ROYALLY!!!!   I have driven 
many other cars, and none has the lap of luxuary, the presence, or the 
style than my caprice.  It's the coolist!!!  See ya!
        Luigi



I used to hate Fords.  I really really hated them.  I've come around quite
a bit and now own a '92 Crown Victoria.  If the General hadn't first
turned the Caprice into a Hudson look-alike, complete with funny side
skirts, and then discontinued it, I'd probably own a Caprice instead. In
this part of the country, the police mostly used Crown Vics even before
the Caprice was discontinued.  Also, around the late '80s consumer reports
started rating the Crown Vic as most reliable American car.

Anyway, I'm amazed I'm a Ford owner now but I'm pretty happy with the car.
I trashed the tranny doing too many full-throttle starts, and when I took
it they said this tranny has some problems (point to the General).  I
found what I think is a pretty good tranny shop and they knew enough to
put in a special shift kit to improve the shift regime.  The Ford
engineers really don't know how to make a good tranny.  They put too much
stress on inadequate parts given the chosen shift schedule, which involves
a kickdown from fourth straight down to first at highway speed.  The
results are pretty exciting, especially given the size of the car, but do
that too often and you need a new tranny pretty quickly.

These guys I found swapped out a cracked drum and put in some thicker
plates of various kinds, drilled some holes to allow fluid to move in new
and different ways, and changed the shift schedule to prevent radical
shiffts.  Now it goes quickly through 3 and 2 before reaching 1.  After a
quick stop and start it's in 2 briefly then 1 and back up through the
gears.  They said they do this for all the local police.

My car is navy blue and drive around in Boston area a lot.  It helps.
It's a good car to have in this part of the country.  I used to have a
small car and had a lot of problems.  Now it is as though I'm driving in
Nebraska.  I have a lot less stress.  I probably shouldn't say anything
lest my luck run out and I start getting run off the road again.

Well, these big V-8s sure are a trip!  I'm reasonably certain
the Vic could dust a Probe in most circumstances.  The steering is
godawful and I would probably have a problem in the twisties, but I bet if
I put on some thick Addco solid-steel sway bars with elastomer bushings
and some better rubber I'd have a solid chance even in the bends.  I've
already replaced the OEM shocks with some nice KYBs.  These provide much
better damping.  The frame could use some improvement, you can tell it has
a tendency to vibrate at low frequency. I mean it should be stiffer.  It's
too bad.  If they'd invested a little more engineering in these cars,
Caprice included, they could have offered something really formidable.  I
guess that is what they did with the Impala SS.  That would be a nice car
to have, but it's too flashy for my taste.  They should have made it much
lower key, maybe with flat black baja wheels like what's his face's Vic in
"Heat."  That Vic was a very cool, low-profile ride.

I've known people with Explorers, Vettes, even 911s.  They all have the
hip machines.  SUV appeal is a total mystery to me.  Crash a Vette and you
explode into a rolling ball of fiberglass shards.  911s are nice, but why
a truly-excellent VW has to cost so much is incomprehensible, and if you
have more than one friend you're #$%^ out of luck.

Long-live RWD V-8 American sedans.  To me, these offer the best balance
of affordability, durability, interior space and passenger carrying
capacity, as well as decent power and better-than OK acceleration times,
better-than-SUV fuel economy, no SUV tippiness, faster than anything but a
$50,000 Accord, er, I mean Acura, or a $100K VW.  These cars lack
refinement, fit and finish quality, and handling, but they've got
everything else very much under control.   And people who are older
than you will call you "Sir."  I rest my case.



Well what the big debate about...ford against chev...the usual or is it
you against the ass hole driving the probe. The person driving the probe
is probably as incompentant as you say. I am how ever a hug ford fan....
and the owner of a 94 Probe GT...and a 86 Mustang as well as a 87 pick
up 4X4...I believe that are good vehicles... none of them have ever let
me down.  The Mustang breaks some parts because it is Drag raced
regulary. I am from Oshawa Ont. I do not believe that a 3800 lbs car
plus driver with a motor that is reted at 170 horse power (looked it up)
could beat a GT probe that weighs 2300lbs and a 2.5 liter 160 horse
motor with a 7000 redline may i add. A SE 4 cylinder, yes...But thats no
competition. That would be like racing my mustang witch turns low 11's
against your car. The SE is made for enocomy. Your 305 is in there
because it has to push a car the size of a house around...not
performance. No matter what kind of vehicles you drive there are awalys
going to be assholes out there that cannot drive. The thing That is hard
to say is which car is better in a crash test.... the ford recieved a
four star rating for the passanger side and a perfect five star for the
drivers side ( in a head on collision).  The caprice has no airbags or
ABS or any type of safety type equipment...though it has a stronger
frame.  Frames have awalys been stronger that unibodies.

My point being a Ford fan is dont judge us for what some other asshole
did...judge us by our tail light as we blow on by you......By the way if
you ever get that led sled down to the track.....compare it to my bone
stock Probe's ET of 15.8 @ 94 MPH...not bad for a stock car...but if you
ever get serious and want to race.... I'll get the Mustang off the
trailor and see who wins. Good luck with your car...My friens is
presently working on a caprice SS he calls it it now has a 383 stroker
in it...it turns 13.2 on slicks....not bad for a tank...

Looking for a race in Canada?  look for the plate QTR HRSE.  Thats
Quater Horse for those of you that are a bit slow....

 ARBOC RACING e mail  [email protected]



Any one into car performance would know that a Chevy 305 V8 4bbl has more
horse power than the 2.2 liter 4 cylinder that they put into the 93 Ford
Probes. Ford Probes are not real sport cars. Ask anyone into sport cars. A
true test of a sport car is racing in the Lemans with Porshe, Jaguer,
Mercedes, and Ferarri. A Ford Probe whold not be consider raced in this race.
A definition of a sports car is: a car that can be driven, raced in its engine
class, and have a resonable chance of winning. The Probe would be classed with
the small Ferarri and would not win. That is why Ford does not race in this
race,anymore.  Yeah, a Caprice whould be lost on curvy roads but in a straight
line it would suck the paint off of your car only if you haven't replaced the
engine in your car with a high performance V6 or V8. I have a Caprice and I
haven't had problems with gas. I had a Ford 4 cylinder and this car I have now
gets just as good of gas milleage. It is better than a Corsica I had which was
desroyed by a Ford truck that ran a red-light. If a car is properly maintained
gas milleage will not decrease by much. My car is not a hunk of junk. In 2 yrs
it is going to be put in a garage because when it gets 20 years old it will be
worth $$$$$$$$$$$. Go ask experts........If the Probe is a good car??????Why
do the police use Caprices???????? Most police departments use Chevrolet.
Police departments must have fast reliable cars.        IMAGINE THAT.



Way to go!!!!! I have owned quite a few cars already in my life time. Recently
it was a 1992 Chevy Corsica but it was destroyed by a moronic Ford owner who
ran a red light. I loved that car but its replacement is much better. Though
the Corsica could perform better on curvy roads, I love my 1986 Caprice
Classic better!!!!! It feels like the road belongs to me!!!! And I can't keep
my foot out of that 4 bbl.  And it sure is a hell of a lot better than a Ford
Probe. If someone kicks my "baby", I hope they have good hopital insurance!!!!
Chevy Rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.................

Sourkrautm


I just read your letter. I have a 305 Caprice Classic my self. And if
any body tuched my car I would hert them to ware they arn't dead but
they are in a lot of pain. But it does all change when it comes to them
if they own a Ford. I would take my Caprice Tow the Ford 8 miles away
Key th shit out of it I would not take anything because Fords are made
of Shit and it's not worth anything. It this unknown person does not say
he's sorry that might be a good idea. since the 305 can destroy any
ford.In fact any Chevy could destroy any Ford.

My Caprice is a 1986 Brougham. It is a dark maroon color but it is faded
right now.  It has only 50,000 miles on it a 3 speed 350 trans.. It does
not have posi but I wish it did.  But I also wish I could have a 1996
Impla SS black on black with black tinted windows. But for now a PSI
Caprice would do with a push bumper.

Do you know where I can order a Push Bar for my Caprice like the cops have
so I can get all the slow ass fords out of my way faster.


After reading your whole webpage on the beastly warbitch CAPRICE, I
must congratulate you on your fine taste in automobiles. I myself have
driven '84 CAPRICE station wagons since I first started driving, and
have nothing but respect for them and their tremendous survivability.
Even the petty blows of probe( who names a car a "Probe?") owner will
roll off like water, and so do deer and traffic signs. There is
something strangely satisfying about driving an enormous slab of steel
through a crowd of plastic lunchboxes on wheels, sometimes straight
through! Anyhow, changing one's air filter on a regular basis prevents
restriction in the intake, and keeps your engine from starving for air.
As much as 20 horsepower can be gained with a low restriction air
filter! I myself would like to pass along the tip, that you should never
buy fuel at one of those super cheap-o gas stations unless it is
Premium... lower grades of fuel often have additives like detergents to
keep them clean enough. This is fine if you own a shit brown probe,
because it is fuel injected, but the CAPRICE you know and love has a
carburetor (at least the 80's cars). These detergents will eat away the
needles in your carburetor because they contain Methanol! I hate to be
boring, but yu can be sure that any V8 car driven sensibly will
outperform any coffee grinder four banger that's whipped all day, and
last longer too! By the way, CAPRICE station wagons have been called the
safest cars in the world until the advent of airbags. Good old Inertia!


FACT: The 92 Caprice is bigger and faster and has airbags.....3 more
things that beat the Forzda probe.

Topher


Hey, my name is David, and I'm 17 years old, I just loved your web page.  I
myself drive a '84 Chevy Caprice Classic.  It looks almost exactly the same
as yours (except with wire wheels).  I am about the most in love person with
the Caprice Classic.   My dream is to own a '73 Caprice Classic some day.
I hate stupid piece of Shit Fords.  All Fords suck *#^@.  I am very disturbed
about the retirement of the Caprice.  Although sales where a little low,
I don't understand why they took it out of production.  I myself think it
was a not so smart idea.

I wish I could get a Caprice PC1 (Police Package).  But I doubt that will
happen.

Well as my last words I would like to say
GENUINE CHEVROLET CAPRICE CLASSIC'S KICK ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

        That's all,
        David L.


Hey man, I don't know, but I love the Chevrolet Caprice Classic that is
made in the 90's and even earlier models, engines out perform any
fucked up Ford, and now that the police people switched on to the Crown
Victoria, they are not happy with the cheap piece of shit at all!

Caprice RULLLLLLLLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mourat Jamoukhanov ([email protected])


As a proud owner of a Ford Probe GT, I would like to say that by no
means is that fat slob associated with Ford, Mazda, or any other ford
owner in the country.  I would also like to bring to your attention,
that the brown Ford Probe mentioned had, in no way, chosen to be
purchased, owned or driven by the fat slob mentioned.  I'm quite sure
that the Probe if given a chance to choose would pick a much better
owner than the fat slob.  As for the challange of caprice vs. probe.  I
would be more than happy to pick up the gauntlet.  ;)

                              -Hatt
                              -Ford Probe GT Website

http://www.wolfenet.com/~hattman/pgt/pgt.htm


Pete,

Yes, I may be late in reading your public crucifixion (spelling?) of
the aforementioned slob, but I like your style.  The take-charge manner
in which you handled the offence is inspiring.  The slob probably would
not have guessed he'd be humiliated world wide.  I'm from Canada and as
a Canadian I think that guy's a loser.  However, contrary to my efforts
to ban these people from procreating, they still persist in their
miserable existences!  I can relate to your letter because I have a
similar problem with a fool who lives 4 doors down.  Every time I take
out my summer car(a modefied for drag racing Ford) for a drive I hear
the oil-burning wheeze of his beat up Z-24.  The loser always screams by
my lane at 50 miles an hour, in town!  The tragedy is that I own a mint
Z-24 myself (he doesn't know).   Losers like that must be silenced
(gassed if possible)  We must lobby the government, flood the newspapers
and tell it on the mountain:  losers can't be allowed to reproduce!

                              E. Rothwell
                              [email protected]


HEY THAT  CAPRICE V's  THE PROBE COMPARISON WAS FUNNY LIKE HELL......HEY MY
FRIENDS GOT A  84 CAPRICE CLASSIC  ITS BLACK WITH CHROME RIMS .....WE RACE
EVERYTHING IN IT ....WE BEAT MUSTANGS NOT JUST PROBES ....FUCK FORDS